I can see clearly now, the nausea is gone....

Week 13-

While last week was technically the beginning of the first week of the second trimester I kind of lumped it with several other weeks since up to last week I had been too nauseous to even think about blogging on a weekly basis. It killed me to even be at the computer screen at work much less be staring at the computer screen to write about my seemingly depressing days of cramming cracker after cracker and bowl of cereal after bowl of cereal down my throat just to feel normal. Ahh, to write about those days after they have already passed seemed far more appropriate.  I think if I would have written week by week after I first found out I was pregnant I would have been writing the following:

• "beware, pregnancy SUCKS!"
• "this will be the LAST and ONLY time I put my body through this!"
• "is this truly how pregnancy is supposed to feel? I hate it!"

So at this point in time, with an honest and true heart, I can say that I have entered what is considered the most blissful and comfortable trimester of being pregnant.  Resuming a normal workout routine has been the highlight of this trimester thus far not to mention driving to work without the sudden urge of stopping for fast food to curb the insane nausea.  Weight training is important to me during pregnancy because i know I will face the day when i can't take the urge to pee every 5 seconds when I run.  Not to mention the load of the belly and the backaches that accompany running while pregnant, so I must have some type of consistency through working out during this pregnancy.  (not to mention the fact that I have always admired the Crossfit women who pump out 25 kipping pull ups all while being 8 months pregnant. Who needs a weight vest when you're pregnant!  Talk about strength building! )I'll be satisfied if I can remain at 10 throughout with the weight gain....

 I can honestly say this week I wasn't craving as many meals per day which is refreshing.  It was getting exhausting actually focusing on eating so much.  I am still trying to eat 5 times a day plus drink 128 oz. of fluids (which is easy given it's been breaching 95 with full on humidity each and every day.  Ahh, summertime in FL...)  Several new revelations:

• I can eat hummus again! Well, at least several tablespoons at a time which is a beautiful thing. 
• I am beginning to be more and more thankful I will be my largest during the fall and wintertime in FL.  I admire those women who are 9 months pregnant on the days that feel like 105-talk about rockstars.
• I am becoming more of a planner! Chris knows my spontaneity gets the best of me.  Sure I always have long term dreams and ambitions, but when it comes to routine, tracking progress for something in life or for forecasting the future I tend to keep my eyes on the 'now'.  But with being a future mom, I know that I am going to have to somewhat set aside my 'just roll with' attitude and start prepping for routine and consistency and I am ok with that.
• my Be Present yoga pants, which have been a staple for teaching and my practice, will now become quite possibly the best prego pant around.  Their soft and stretchy material coupled with their drawstring waist should be able to last me all the way through my pregnancy, fingers crossed of course.
• I will vow to use Cocoa Butter every day!  I have heard from multiple women that they are sans stretch marks because of this magical potion.

 

 I must admit emotions are beginning to kick in and that's a lot for me to admit, I tend to always put a smile on my face and internalize any other feelings.  But the books are correct, things change when you are pregnant but at the same time I have vowed to Chris never to let any surge of hormones get the best of me!  And speaking of Chris, he has been absolutely incredible so far.  I feel that he has not only accepted the role of being a dad more quickly than I a mom, but has been been very supportive in making sure I have as awesome of a pregnancy as possible.  He reminds of what I can and can't eat, what I can take if I have a headache and I've caught him immersed in his 'what to expect as a father' book (and even bumming that he forgot it on his trip to Vegas!)  What a guy...I couldn't be more blessed for the love and support I feel from him-he will be quite possibly the coolest and the BEST Dad!

Part IV- The Light at the End of the First Trimester Tunnel

Part IV-Week 12

There is a light at the end of the first trimester tunnel.  For me it hit on Monday June 13^th, the first week of my second trimester: Week 13.  Pretty amazing timing I must say!  The books are right!  All of the madness/insanity/crazy irritability and stop-me-in-my-tracks nausea of the first trimester, which is like a complete blur, is beginning to take a back seat to the new (er, old) me.  I cleaned, let me rephrase that, SANITIZED the house from top to bottom on Monday and still had the energy to teach a killer hot yoga class that evening.  AND, I still had energy after.  Who is this individual I thought to myself? Oh wait, it’s ME! The old me! The health nut in me can officially begin to stomach some of the things that weren’t on my first trimester menu, the gym and trails are back to being my refuge and I finally feel more in control of myself.  And a beautiful thing happened, reality hit even more for Chris and I (I think Chris more than myself!); we had our first pre-natal appt. and ultrasound on June 14^th.  We heard the heart beating at a very strong 150 BPM, and the nurse confirmed that I was a bit farther than she thought- 12 weeks and 6 days.  Wow!  We couldn’t believe it.  Only 8 weeks away from being half way through when it seems like the (fun) of pregnancy just began.  Although some weeks it felt like the week was never, ever going to be over.  I’m thrilled to begin what is considered one of the best trimesters of pregnancy.  I love that I can still put on my running shoes and hit the trails or even the treadmill in the gym and not feel completely uncomfortable.  It is a blessing to be able to be a pregnant runner thus far because I have heard many women runners stories whose dreams of running with child are crushed when their bodies tell them no.  I hope to be able to continue for as long as possible and perhaps get more friendly with my nemesis, the treadmill, as the summer months get hotter even in the mornings and at night.  Physically, I can’t tolerate super hot temps.  I have already begun to feel  it while teaching hot yoga as I sweat more, quicker, and my heart rate jumps through the roof.  I have been monitoring my heart rate as frequent as I can when I work out and I can just ‘feel it’ when it gets too high.  Although in the next couple of weeks I hope to add a heart rate monitor to my garmin watch and be able to calculate my heart rate with each workout with ease.   Thanks to Chris I have an amazing way to track my mileage by foot and by bike, although it hasn’t seen as many miles as it would if I wasn’t pregnant!

Another revelation for me was accepting the fact that I could no longer squeeze my little bump into my jeans and that I had to use the belly band.  What a beautiful day it was when I realized that it wasn’t all that bad! It felt so much more comfortable to not force the buttoning of my pants and I am loving the soft feeling of elasticity over my belly verses the tight pinch of buttons. The bump is beginning to show more with tight fitting shirts which is practically all that I have in my wardrobe. There are so many options out there for non-pregnancy/pregnancy shirts that I can wear during the baby carrying phase and then after so I’m stoked to not really have to own maternity clothes perhaps.  We’ll see how long that lasts! Regardless, I have come into more of an embracing phase and am gradually able to come into accepting being  a mom and the little bundle of joy that I am carrying inside. 

New Food Loves:

·         Odawalla bars-along with an apple, they have become my new favorite mid-morning snack

·         Triscuits-I can’t seem to get enough of them with boursin cheese-double YUM!

·         Foods with a hint of spice-during the first trimester I was avoiding them but I have always loved spicy food, plus I eat less when things have a hint of spice! 

·         Starbucks shaken green tea/lemonades- I have to figure out their recipe-with the hint of tea and citrus combined with just a touch of caffine ( I’m only supposed to have 150 mg a day) its perfect for a hot summer day or to curb some of the headaches that have been onset by the pregnancy

Physically Speaking:

·         Weight Gain: 3 lbs. –according to the doctor it’s ½ a pound a week up until the middle of the second trimester and then it’s a pound. So, I’m on track and I feel the majority of it is definitely in the mid-section!

·         Energy is UP-way up in comparison and I am digging being able to focus at work, working out, focus on the business and begin the preparations to the house that will be necessary for the little one's arrival!

~Belly Week 12 (6 days)-Definitely beginning to pooch!~

~And finally what we were waiting for, a picture of Baby Premo in all his/her approx. 2 oz. of glory! ~

Part III- Let the Check-ups Begin!

Part III

And so the appointments begin.  The first appointment (which at this point no one even knew we were pregnant, some call it crazy, I call it preparation for how we were going to tell people and who needed to be told first) was May 17^th- the walk in.  The first appointment at Eglin Hospital isn’t really an appointment at all.  You walk in, fill out a booklet of paperwork, pee in a cup and have about 7 viles of blood drawn.  Fun!  It’s there that they confirm your hCG hormone levels are up and that you are in fact pregnant! Yay! Confirmation besides  2 - $12 sticks in a box!  We then scheduled our OB orientation and of course our first prenatal appt- June 14^th and that day, it seemed like FOREVER away.  Almost a month, I couldn’t believe it!  We were anxious and curious as to how far along I was but, we would have to wait.  The OB orientation went well, we got a ton of literature and they answered some basic questions about what to do and not to do when you are pregnant as well as resources available especially in the 2^nd and 3^rd trimesters such as breastfeeding classes and breathing classes.  Had this helped reality sink in for us?  Especially as Chris got a tour of the hospital where he would need to take me for this and for that, and I actually was told ‘Congrats on being a mom’?  Nope.  No reality yet. Still shock and awe.  When would we actually give into our reality and assume the new roles that we were about to have?  When would we be able to accept this new part of our journey that we were about to embark on? Would it be the when we saw pictures of the little one? When we told friends and family?  I know the day will come and until then, I'll continue to take care of myself as best as possible hoping soon those maternal instincts would somehow find me.

Physical Feelings:

·         full/bloated constantly

·         low energy levels

·         slight nausea (but beginning to dissipate!)

·         the feeling of beginning to get a bump-exciting yet terrifying!

·         walking feels amazing/running feels awesome but I feel like I have to pee after a mile!

·         Smells are making me nauseous: coffee, strong air fresheners, wet dog (which is unavoidable when I take 3 of them 3 times a week to the sound!), COFFEE, laundry detergent,

·         Smells I am liking: rosemary, citrus, lavender, Zum Mist Eucalyptus (a spray I use in yoga that I literally can't get enough of!)

Part II- The Search for Energy and the Perfect Curb-My-Nausea Foods

Part II-week 11

As the days post the pregnancy test began to pass, as the shock still began to sink in that I was no longer just sick but with child, other signs began to hit me like a ton of bricks- irritability.  Even though I  consider myself a pretty even keel person, always keeping my emotions in check, I was become irritated at EVERYTHING.  Even if I didn’t physically show it, the smallest things were making me feel like I was going bonkers.  And then, the low energy and disinterest in common,daily activities began to set in.  I didn’t want to clean.  Doing the dishes, vacuuming, dusting and mopping all didn’t appeal to me.  Making the bed in the morning took every last bit of strength I had and I was even loosing interest in wanting to go to work, to work out , to walk the dogs and even check my e-mail!  It was something that was so surreal to me because NEVER in my life had I felt this way.  I have always been full of life, full of energy and had a sense of get-up-and-go that loosing interest in life itself was definitely becoming a concern to me.  Was this how pregnancy was truly supposed to feel?  Was I getting a form of depression during pregnancy that I had no control over?  I was a whole lot of bit frightened and scared and it wasn’t until I picked up a copy of “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” that I realized all of my feelings, my aversions, my emotions and my moods were completely normal and to be expected.  I was relieved.   I realized that the nausea and disinterest in life would quickly pass as the first trimester came to end.  I only had a few more weeks so I was completely relieved that I would hopefully be close to being back to my old self. 

My aversions during weeks 8-?:

Things that I LOVED before were seemingly becoming unbearable for me to even smell.   This made me sad but I knew someday I would renew my love for these foods:

·         Raw almond and peanut butter-and I am a peanut butter FREAK.

·         Hummus- whatever will I do without you?

·         COFFEE?- Really? The queen of all things coffee, the one who considers any coffee shop her second home, couldn’t even stand the smell of the grounds?  I think I’m going to be sick just thinking about being sick in not wanting to drink a cup-of-joe.

·         Oatmeal- I suppose this goes with my almond butter aversion as my fave breakfast for some time prior to conception was oatmeal, a tablespoon of almond butter and craisens and golden raisins. YUM, before, not so much now.

·         WINE-not only am I not supposed to be drinking it of course, but the thought and smell of it actually makes me nauseous. ( And here I thought that this was going to be the most difficult parts of being pregnant, giving up my love for wine, and it is  actually one of the easiest parts!)

Things I LOVE now:

Some of these are new cravings, others are things that I have always loved that are now continuing to comfort my nausea:

·         Cinnamon-always LOVED, apparently always will.

·         Cereal- I love it all almost.  There was even a time when I grabbed a box of peanut butter  captain crunch.  SO not healthy but worth it to curb the nausea. Mostly Special K cinnamon and pecan, Raisin Bran and Cracklin Oat Bran have been my go to’s. 

·         Citrus-oranges, grapefruit,  lemonade flavoring in my teas, lemon in water, anything with a hint of citrus I gravitate towards. 

·         Club Soda concoctions-  I can’t get enough club soda and splash of cranberry with a squeeze of lime.  I feel as if I am indulging even though it is one of the healthiest drinks to consume.  It is perfect for after meals when trying to sooth the growing pains or an upset tummy.

·         Tuna-always loved it, its been a perfect lunch for me especially in trying to consume my 12 oz. of fish in a week for the Omega 3’s.  I love that I can still have fish even if I have to pass on my fave of all faves: sushi. 

·         Mexican food-black beans, chicken, cheese, guacamole, salsa, chips, all ingredients that I normally can’t get enough of and especially now that I’m pregnant.  Chips and salsa always have been and always will be one of my greatest weaknesses.

·         Yogurt,berries and almonds- I can’t get enough of this yummy breakfast.  Usually this is breakfast # 2 or snack number one for me in the morning and it completely hits the spot. 

Here's to the FINAL week of the first trimester and keeping my fingers crossed that all that I have read is true-I will begin to feel 'normal'!

The Roller Coaster Ride that is the First Trimester- Part I

April 26^th-the day that I knew something other than a ferocious sinus infection was taking over my body.  I was definitely 'off' feeling.  I am not one to usually get nauseous, not really on roller coaster rides or boats out to sea.   Yet that day, I felt like I was going to throw up literally every second of the day.  I felt this overwhelming urge to eat comfort foods.  Fast food, bread, cereal, anything that would curb this sensation that I needed to be hugging the porcelain 24/7.  My first craving, McDonald's fish sandwiches.  Anyone that knows me knows that ever since I read ‘Fast Food Nation’ I have an aversion to fast food.  It is something that I have only eaten since then very sparingly, usually when we are on  a roadtrip and are limited on options will I indulge in a greasy cheeseburger and a highly carbonated soda.  But that day, I needed a fish sandwich and it was the only thing in my mind that was going to save me.    This was so odd I kept thinking to myself.  The next day came and went and similar symptoms.  Another day of odd comfort food cravings ( such as a steak sandwich, weird) as well as the beginning of my food aversions.  Of course at this point, still thinking that it is because I have a sinus infection that my body is totally ‘off’, I really had no idea that I was having food ‘aversions’ and ‘cravings’ because I was incubating a little one inside of me.  I had begun a dosage of 24 hr. time release amoxicillin and I thought for sure it was the meds that were making me want to loose my mind ( and the strong overwhelming desire to upchuck my food).   

May 10^th-The true test.  Literally.  I gave Chris a warning 2 days before that something was just ‘not right’ about how I was feeling and that I felt the strong desire to take a pregnancy test.  It was one of the hardest things I had to say to him in all of our 5 years of marriage.  I felt unsure of what his reaction would be, would he be upset? ecstatic? scared? Surprisingly he was supportive of me taking it I think with the impression that there is just no way that I could be pregnant.  I had been on birth control for far too long, even though I did have a slip up (our anniversary and birthday(s) climbing trip to Oklahoma was taken sans birth control as I had forgotten my refills on the counter.) But still, there was just no way that it was positive.  It was one of the most stressful things that I have ever done- take that test.  ( and I have taken a lot of tests in my day, school tests that is!)  The first test: positive. Wow, this is really happening I thought to myself.  I quickly showed Chris and he didn’t believe me.  “Take another one!” he said.  He just didn’t believe that the first one could be accurate.  At this point I didn’t think so either.  So I opened the next package and took the test.  Again, positive.   At this point I was in complete shock.  There is no way I thought. No way.  We had talked and talked and talked again and we were waiting.  We weren’t completely prepared and so we knew we needed some more time.  2 positive tests later though, and there was ‘no more time’.  It was real.  I was pregnant and that was now the reality.  Not the reality that we had just 5 minutes before where we had time to plan.  The planning had to begin now and we had to fully prepare ourselves for the steps to come.  Shock, awe, jaws dropping to the floor and a smile here and there.  That can best describe that first evening that we realized we would be parents and that just as we had talked about before, the rest of our lives would now be forever transformed.  We were expecting and that little one would continue growing whether we accepted it or not!!

~Week 10 Belly Shot! I have an inkling my flame tattoo will be a bonfire by the third trimester~here's to hoping it shrinks back to normal post-baby!~

Fresh Beginnings and New Paths......

November....since that time, Winter in Northwest Florida has come and gone and the beginning of AbFab has since grown into something beautiful, Spring brought about an intoxicating smell of sweet jasmine on our back pergola along with beautiful fuchsia azaleas blooming all around our house and summer has been in full force with temperatures breaching 100 limiting runs and bike rides to steamy early mornings but increasing our time spent in the turquoise waters of the beautiful Gulf Coast. We are growing into our location, with each and every week settling in more and more even though the reminiscing has continued for me. Nostalgia of a phase in our lives that is in the past, and a continuous drive to want to embrace the new phase that we are in. House, dogs, new job(s) and A BABY on the way.

There, I said it. Wow, little did I know how completely in shock I would be at the thought of Chris and I embarking on yet another new phase. I knew that we had settled into the thought of having what we lovingly referred to as 'The 5 Year Plan", and I knew that a baby, though we talked about it regularly, was something that we just didn't feel completley prepared for. I have since learned that complete preparation for bringing a little one into this world clearly doesn't exist, but we thougth that somehow we would reach that 'we're ready' moment in a different way other that complete shock. I call it our 'planned, unplanned' little one. We couldn't ask for a better time frame. Chris isn't deploying, we have readily available resources for babysitting and assisting us as brand new parents (aka Mom and Lauren and Cory :-) and we have 3 years left on the Gulf Coast before we will even be thinking about uprooting to the next phase of our journey. I now work as a contractor for SAIC in addition to teaching yoga and being a partner in AbFab, so we have additional finances coming in (financially I have heard you are NEVER ready) but we will be working extra hard these next few months to build up our nest egg.

We're working on getting out of the shock phase and into the researching phase, preparing ourselves as much as possible for this little surprise that will be arriving in less approx. 7 months. First appointment is on Tuesday, our first ultrasound, our first chat with the doctors and hopefully a big leap into finally swallowing the fact that we will be parents! I will delve into the details of this discovery later, as well as report on how our first doc. visit goes. Here's to the next phase our lives, perhaps the craziest, most difficult yet rewarding adventure yet.  Approximately 12 weeks down by the way, 28 to go until the big arrival!